


The (off) Colorful adventures of Captain Lars

by thunderformatron



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Gen, Ongoing story, Rhodonite - Freeform, Space Rock, Trip - Freeform, second story, slight AU, space, the isnt enough of the off colors
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-02
Updated: 2018-09-18
Packaged: 2019-07-05 16:25:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15867351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thunderformatron/pseuds/thunderformatron
Summary: Adventures of Lars and his crew as they travel through deep space.





	1. Plantae

All was normal for Captain Lars and his crew. They were in the Sun Incinerator flying towards Earth. Then warning signs flashed across the windows. Suddenly, the stars came rushing back into place.

"Captain Lars, the Nova engines shut down!" exclaimed Left Rutile. 

"Lord! Not again we just got it fixed. Flourite, check all of our systems, I'm sick of this ship breaking," says Lars. 

A few minutes later Flourite came up from the engine room. She turned to Lars and announced, "The Nova engines overheated and new radiators are needed."

He then turned to Padparadscha. "Pads, are there any nearby inhabited planets?"

"I predict that we will exit hyperspace near a Plantae moon outpost. They will have a small repair shop. 

"Good, punch it in the navigational computer, wherever it is. I'll figure out what a Plantae is when we land. I hope we can fix the engines when we get there."

Minutes later, the Rutile twins brought the Sun Incinerator in for a landing on the landing platform. Flourite stayed behind to inspect and refuel the ship. Despite Lars wanting her to come inside, She told him, "Don't worry Captain, It doesn't bother me. I'm used to not fitting in places. I've stayed behind when we went to the asteroid base for the spare parts."

Lars and the other off colors then left the Sun Incinerator and moved to the building connected to the landing pad. Despite being undead, Lars still needed a space suit in a vacuum, as he still needed air to breathe. Surprisingly, the building had an airlock built into the entrance. 

After the airlock finished pressurizing, Lars turned to Rhodonite, asking, "Is there a reason all gem things have an atmosphere; specifically one I can breathe."

"We feel the most comfortable in worlds with atmosphere, and we also need the air to speak. I'm not too sure why it has oxygen. " was her reply.

"Eh, guess that makes sense. I haven't seen you really talk out in space. Still doesn't answer why I am able to breathe."

When the second airlock door opened, they found themselves in what looked like a bar. A strange vine-like creature walked up to them. He spoke up, saying, "What happens when 3 gemstones and a sapies walk into a bar? It's been a while since we've had some visitors from the Jewel system. Well follow me, I'll get you a booth to sit in. I assume the large gem with that ship is yours, yes? Well, we'll have it topped off by the time you're done. My names Matcha, what can I start you out with tonight?"

"Some water, I think? Maybe a sandwich?" said Lars, not fully understanding the current situation.

"Just a little wine, I don't want to get too drunk, in case something happens," said Rhodonite to the waiter.

The Rutile twins said that they didn't eat, and, to Lars' surprise, Padparadscha ordered hard liquor. Lars then asked the gems with him, "Wait, you guys drink, I didn't know you could be affected by alcohol."

"Some higher class gems shapeshift themselves in a way to get the effects of the drink," responded Right Rutile. Left Rutile then said, "Because of our conjoined state, shapeshifting is difficult for us, so we only do it when necessary"

"I guess that makes sense," Lars said. Turning to face Rhodonite, he asked, "Who are the creatures that run this place. They look like this one alien from a tv show of this kid that turns into different aliens."

"Oh! As you heard, they're called the Plantae, from the planet Choro. The best way I can describe it is like a reversal of your ecosystem. These creatures grow out of the ground, sort of like us gems, but they need sunlight to live, and use minerals in their planet's crust to grow and eventually leave their containment sphere," replied Rhodonite.

"Containment sphere? Do you mean a seed, Rhodonite?

Before Rhodonite could respond, Padparadscha interrupted. Speaking in a slurred speech she announced, "Freindssss, I've had a wonderrrrrfull vissssionn! I will orderrrr looootss of alcoooholll and becooome veeery intoxicated."

"Oh, no!" Rhodonite exclaimed, "I forgot to tell Padparadscha not to drink so much. She gets drunk very quickly. No Agates or Lazulis wanted to take her back to wherever they were staying." She then added on softly, "No one wanted to be near her that much anyway"

"Really? I guess she looks like she would get drunk quickly. Well then. Let's go to the ship. Flourite probably has it all fueled up by now" Lars commanded.

On the way out, Lars shot some credits to the bartender. The bartender also gave Lars some more food and commented on the fact he looked different from 'others' he had seen. Heading back out of the airlock, the group made their way back to the Sun Incinerator. Steeping through the hatch, Flourite greeted them. She told them that the ship was fueled. Lars sat down in the commander's seat, Rhodonite went to lay Padparadscha down in one of the cubbies for Emerald's personal guards. Returning to her post, she and the Rutile twins activated the engines, and the Sun Incinerator leaped up from the pad. The main engines cycled on, and the craft shot into the darkness of space.

Lars leaned back in his chair, satisfied with the day's events. Yes, the Nova drive broke, and yes, they still weren't any closer to Earth, but he had seen a new alien species and now knew his crew could get drunk, if that even is a good thing. So all in all, he was pretty satisfied with the events of the day. 

Then the com activated. A distorted voice spoke out, first in a language Lars couldn't understand, then in basic (gem language). "Mayday -zzttzztt- anyone out th -zzttzztt- ease help. Under attack -zzttzztt- mediate help. -zzttzztt- dinates: x:3728 y:827342 z:746" The transmission then cuts out. 

"Well, crew," Lars said, "Looks like we have someone to save. Another day calls for another adventure!" With that, the Sun Incinerator sped towards the direction of the distress beacon, ready to investigate the mysteries that remained ahead.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lars and the off colors fight some vikings

ch 2: save our ship  
  
"Captain, we're approaching the signal of the distress beacon.  The wreckage is up ahead," reported Right Rutile.  "It appears to be a capital ship, but I've never seen one like this before.  It is so impractical, the hangar is exposed," was the response from Rhodonite.  "Well, team lets go investigate. Commence the docking procedures," the pink space captain commanded.  
  
The Sun Incinerator flew near the destroyed ship and entered its hanger bay, which lowered the ship into an internal bay.  Lars dawned his decked out space suit, and they began to investigate the deserted hallways.  The passage's emergency lights were illuminated with a red glow.    
  
"Jeez, this place is really eerie," commented Lars.  "I hope this place doesn't have any traps or anything."  
  
And as fate would have it, Lars triggered a trap, causing machine guns to burst out of the floor.  Lars grabbed his sword from his pocket dimension, cutting off the guns from their mounts.  The space captain then motioned for everyone to stay quiet, and move carefully.  As they progressed through the corridors, they had to defend themselves against many different traps and snares, but eventually made their way to the command center.  The Rutile twins then activated the ship's log.  Upon the project, an image of a human appeared and began to read out the last entry into the log, saying, "Log date: 43875, The evangelist is currently being attacked by a swarm of pirates.  The ship's defenses are falling, and our offensive systems are offline.  This will probably be my last entry.  Whoever finds this log, I ask you to return it to Mr. Daver on the largest continent of the planet Hope.  Thank you.   -Captain Betty."  
  
"Captain, she couldn't've gone far.  Its only been so long, and pirates usually stop at the nearest trading post, which is on that planet over there," Rhodonite said, pointing out the window.  
  
"Well, then, let's go!" exclaimed Lars.  
  
Before walking back to the ship, Pads, because of her diminutive size, retrieved the black box; then they all headed back.  Flourite did a system check, and they left the hangar.

* * *

 

As they approached the trading post, Lars noticed that there were a lot of human looking people, except they had more varying skin colors.  As they left the ship, Flourite went to see if there were any nova drive replacement parts; Lars and the rest of the homeworld outcasts went to investigate the beet up cargo ship also landed there.  The ship bore the traditional skull and crossbones on its side.  As they got closer, the crew stepped out.  One man with greenish blue skin and a red viking beard, one 'female' Plantae with a bright neon shirt, and two gems, one nephrite, and one citrine.    
  
"Hey!" Lars shouted at the group, getting their attention, "Were you the ones who raided that freighter a couple of hours ago?"    
  
"Yeah, so what?" the brawny man replied.  The Plantae spoke up, stating, "We got the girl right here, want to see her?"  
  
"Yeah I do, she deserves to be free, not sold into an illegal slave farm.  Off colors, attack!" Lars commanded.  
  
Retrieving his sword, Lars ran forward, the others following suit.  Rhodonite with a crossbow, the Rutiles with a double blade dagger, and Pads, well Padparadscha never had a weapon, but she looked ready to fight, at least.  
  
Lars charged towards the viking, who had armed himself with a battle-axe.  The blade of the axe blocked Lars' swing, so he quickly brought his own blade into a defensive position.  Meanwhile, the Plantae was reaching out with her arms, and the Rutiles were only managing to defend themselves because for every arm they cut off, a new one would take its place, not allowing for a gap to take an offensive.  Rhodonite, however, had the two other gems on the defensive.  Her bow, also effective as a melee weapon, allowed her to press the gems up against the back of the ship.  The citrine had a small scythe, and the nephrite had a full body shield.  Eventually, Rhodonite got an array of arrows through the shield and poofed the nephrite.  She then had the citrine cornered, who grabbed her fallen comrade and held up her hands in surrender, dropping her weapon.  
  
Rhodonite then turned to help the Rutiles, who were still struggling against the Plantae.  Lars was still fighting the viking, and it seemed the two were evenly matched, neither of them able to get the upper hand.  The viking then noticed Padparadscha standing off to the side.  Strafing to his left, he snatched up the orange sapphire, who then said, "Oh no!  I predict that I shall be captured!"  
  
"Looks like your predictions are a little late, eh," snarled the viking, holding her hand against his axe.  Lars didn't know how to get out of this one.  If he attacked, Pads would get shattered.  He didn't know what to do.  Maybe he could go for the legs- no that wouldn't work.  What about- no.  Lars couldn't think of anything to do but charge and hope for the best, so that's exactly what he did.  
  
Everything seemed to move in slow motion.  Lars, step by step, running at the viking.  The smile on the ladders face, ready to deliver the   Padparadscha, blissfully unaware of the events occurring.  All of a sudden, Lars gets this strange feeling, an instinct, telling him to put his arms forward.  Lars obliged, dropping the sword.  Then, his hands started vibrating, and suddenly, sound waves emitted from his hands, knocking Padparadscha free from the viking's grasp.  The pink space captain snatched Pads from the air and landed on his feet.  As he turned around, he saw that Rhodonite had all of her arms wrapped around the Plantae, making sure she couldn't escape.  
  
Lars then turned to the viking, demanding, "Now,  where is Captain Betty?"  
  
"She's in the cargo hold," was his timid response.  Lars lowered the pirates' ship's cargo lift, entering the darkened storage bay.  Activating the floodlights he found a solitary container inside.  As he approached, he could see the silhouette of a young woman kneeling on the metal.   
  
"Come to torture me some more," she said.  
  
  Lars shook his head, replying, "No, I'm here to rescue you."  
  
Lars came closer to the cage, and with a quick slash of his sword, he shattered the lock in two.  The woman opened the door and stood up, looking around.    
  
"Only two days and I'm a mess.  I don't know how people do it," she murmured.  Then addressing Lars, she said, "Thank you for freeing me, I don't know where they would've taken me."  
  
"Don't mention it, we need some stuff from here anyway.  We saw your freighter in orbit, we recovered the black box if you want it back."  
  
"Thank you.  I have some important information on there.  Say, can I hitch a ride on your ship back to Hope."  
  
"Sure thing, if there are some nova thruster parts around here.  Let's go."  
  
Lars and Betty left the ship and made their way back towards the Sun Incinerator.  Rhodonite threw the band of pirates back into the ship, slamming the ramp closed.  As they boarded the ship, Flourite informed the captains that the nova drive's backup drive was up and running.  Reclining in his seat, Lars gave the order to lift off.  Soon enough, the warship was piercing the atmosphere and then jumping to hyperspace.  
  
A/N  I swear, the fact that I can only write past 10 or when I'm tired doesn't help me.

**Author's Note:**

> A/N So, I've started another story. I don't know how often this story will be updated, as school has started. So, I hope that doesn't bother anyone. Thanks for reading. p.s. the other story hasnt been posted here yet


End file.
